But here’s the biggest reason to move on, and the one most of us are least aware of: right now there’s something better that might be available to you that will not be able to enter your life because you look “content.” You already have someone at your side, so there’s a “No Vacancy” sign above your head diverting anyone who might be interested in you. You think the only option you have is the one in your hands, but it’s not. What would happen if those other options knew you were single?If they knew you were unhappy in that “thing” they saw you in?
I challenge all of you who are in a relationship right now, over the next thirty days to do all the things you did for your partner in the first six months you were together. Like magic, they will start doing things you have been wanting them to do for months.
It’s amazing how easy it is to rekindle a relationship, but we all stand on principle so much that we don’t allow ourselves to do the things to make it happen. So think about what you did for your lover during the first six months, and do them all over the next thirty days.
You can simply leave if your heart isn’t fully engaged. I believe it’s more due to people who just never should have been married in the first place.
(At least while you’re just dating—being married and raising kids together, yes, you need to stick around and give it every shot you can unless you’ve suffered too much to stomach any more.) You can exit if you simply feel, “Hey, I like you. And then finally admitted at age 49 what they probably should have admitted at age 24 when they’d only been dating 3 yrs.♦◊♦Guy, girl, gay, straight, whatever: If it’s love you want, give your venture enough time to have a chance to flourish, but just as a venture capitalist doesn’t make unconditionally investments forever, pull your money at some point if you’re not seeing enough return on your contributions.
I totally believe in love for myself and my friends, but what I believe in more is that it takes a really long time to get to know someone and it's a complicated process.
Whirlwind romances were all the rage for me in 1997, but I'm older and wiser now ... The first three months of knowing someone is a time of illusions. You need those three months to gather the data you need to decide if you want this person in your life for the next three months.
They stay in something “ok” for months and even years on end, preferring the safety of mediocrity to the angst of loneliness.
In the end, they fail to make space in their lives for the right person because there’s no room.
Why don’t they act the way they did the first six months? Why don’t they do the things they used to do during the first six months, like write me love letters? Why aren’t they attacking me sexually in the same way? The vulnerability, openness and beauty of those first six months at that point are gone. I must need to touch him more.” The first six months of a relationship are beautiful.
Why is it that we are so amazing in those first six months of a relationship? With each fight or misunderstanding after that, we take another piece back. You hope that they will notice and think, “Oh my God, he’s not touching me as much.
If you want someone who lives passionately, has an interesting, fulfilling career, has tons of hobbies, fills the room with their personality and inspires other through their actions, then you need to be that kind of person, too. We settle for mediocrity in ourselves and yet expect to end up with Leonardo Di Caprio or Keira Knightley.